Preferred Language

This blog post is taken from my book Golden Nuggets, and it’s a great reminder that good communicators do their best to understand (and use) the other person’s “preferred language.”

When you take the time to figure out how others communicate, you have a better chance of building rapport by directing your questions and comments in a way that they’ll most likely appreciate and understand.

For example: if someone responds with “I see…” then it shows that they lean towards visual dominance and you can ask them, “Can you see what I’m talking about?”

If they respond with “I hear…” then it shows that they’re auditory learners and you can ask them, “How does this sound to you?”

If they respond with “I feel…” then it shows that they lead with their emotions and you can ask them, “How do you feel about what I just said?”

If they respond with “I think…” then it shows that they’re intellectual and you can ask them, “So, what do you think about this?”

One more time, whenever possible,try to understand (and use) the other person’s “preferred language.”

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